newness.

late Tuesday night. a glass of tea sits. it sweats. it waters. sips taken every now and again. the Bible opened to a Psalm with pen marks underlining what speaks inspiration and hope. Psalm 138 to be specific. "i bow down toward your holy temple and give thanks to your name," verse 2 reads. the beauty of God's Word brings so much tenderness to the soul. so much simple joy bound up in the heart. precious reminders of Who holds tomorrow and the fragility of life. let the small simplicities and precious joys of Christ fill in the space. when all else has faded and slipped through the cracks, the unchanged and unwavering Lord remains.





I wish that I would stop and actually smell the roses more. I don't just ignored the fragrance, I nearly pass by these fragile buds on the other side without batting an eye. I am so busy of looking to the needs and longings of my own life that I fall short of taking the moment to appreciate what the Lord has given me and all the people who are around me everywhere I go. I'm constantly looking for something so simple and no-so-simple like a sunrise, and all the time the sun rises and lowers without me stopping to notice that it was there in the first place. The pace we carry around in our lives is unstoppable until...we must stop. We're all guilty of these hurried foot-steps. Where is this generation going? We're always going, going. Technology has over-run us, and we let it in without even thinking twice. (This blog being an example). We don't even notice the familiar or the simple joys of life. We overlook things that should be considered precious reminders of Who we serve and Who withholds no good thing. I often look at God wishing I had joy and peace, failing to realize I had it all along. I'm constantly on the lookout for the meaning of my life, blindly forgetting that the meaning for my life is for the glory of God. I need the Lord to take these thoughts and make them truly precious again, gaining a newness in Him and in His Kingdom. When the dust has settled covering all that I deem important, I realize Who and What is all-lasting, never wavering, and unalterable. "How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them! If I would count them, they are more than the sand." - Psalm 139:17-18



Since graduating from college, I have not only applied for several jobs, but I have also applied my mind to many possibilities. I find myself compiling a lengthy list of lofty hopes in my head of what I'd love to do with my life. My life has entered a new realm; a realm dwelling in possibility and freshness. The Lord has been working inside my heart, bringing a newness and clean slate. My life is currently about new beginnings, literally and spiritually. I'm training my ears, eyes, and heart to look and listen to Him. One thing I'm certain is that the Lord never withholds any good thing from me. His sovereignty and faithfulness never fails.



"The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me; your steadfast love, O LORD, endures forever. Do not forsake the work of your hands." -Psalm 138:8

in one autumnal face...

my beloved season has almost arrived at its prime. autumn. the things i feel and see when i think on such a season. the loveliest colors which blend in and out through the foliage of the slowly decaying trees, the copper glow of candles in jack-Os, the beaming beauty of the late afternoon sunset, the shivers up my spine from the chill in the air, the wind that blows the strands of my hair, and the simple joy of the crunch and frost underfoot upon the dead leaves. those are some of the simplest and the loveliest beauties of autumn. what would i do without this season? i do not feel as though i am that kind of person who only delights in autumn because of any reason, but because it is a part of me. it is i in season form. perhaps because i was born into autumn. there is no such delight i feel as i feel during autumn. the weather makes my heart go pitter-patter. there is nothing so beautiful as i have seen in one autumnal face.



well, much has happened since my last post. i've seen my sweet Lord revive my heart from pain and have seen the answer to prayer. He is good in all things. He is very good! i'm still trying to find my way through this tunnel, but i know all through the way He is holding my hand and leading me all the way until i reach that light at the end. in all things, He is good and He fills my heart with all kinds of happy. whether it is joyous, painful, or difficult, is it happy. He is that happy.



these last few weeks i've become so moved with missions, helping the hurting, and spreading the love of our Lord abroad. i have a passion and a burden within my heart to do something for my God but i don't know what yet. i have a growing interest in helping and promoting International Justice Mission (IJM). i would love for my school campus to begin a chapter for IJM. human trafficking is such a terrible thing and should be brought into awareness. it is one of the most horrifying crimes occurring in the world. i cannot even begin to imagine the horror, the pain, the emptiness, and the suffering the women and young girls are coping with.
besides IJM, my heart is burdened for the people in Israel, Africa, and most anywhere. but i am also concerned for the souls of those around me, whether it is a student i come in contact with, a complete stranger, or a homeless person. my heart should be burdened not only outside the united states or my state, but also for those in my own backyard. we, as believers, are so apt to serve in other countries, but where is our heart for the people we live around? the love of Christ should never ignore our own neighbors and city. Jesus did not ask for us to carry His love and message far, but everywhere!

last weekend i was honored to meet my favorite recording artist; the lovely voice of the singer who warms my heart and fills it with inspiration, sara groves. what a lovely and sweet lady she is!
sara's music has ministered to my life in so many amazing and inspirational ways. her talent is unmatched and rare, as is her beautiful, rich voice. she fills her music with down-to-earth lyrics, and demonstrates her faith in Christ in every one of her songs. i discover something new and real every time i listen to her albums (which is practically nonstop all day, every day). it was such a joyous and happy moment to meet sara after seeing her in concert a few times. she was such a dear to sign all of my albums, and wrote such sweet things on them too. she is a beautiful person, and has a beautiful heart for God and His growing kingdom. i feel like kid in a candy store knowing and listening to sara's music. i am such a big and proud fan, and cannot imagine my life without the real and true talent of the most beautiful, inspirational, and unique artist i have ever heard, seen, and met. her style is genreless.

when life had begun, i was woven and spun.

i should be offended, broken, & hurt right now, but i am not. i know i feel somewhat disappointed but somehow i have managed to look up and realized that God knows what is happening to me. He understands my doubt and my heart. somehow in the midst of my pain and confusion, i have decided to bless instead of curse. trust instead of doubt. love instead of hate. humbly come instead of fall in my pride. & pray instead of worry. i believe charles spurgeon wrote it best; "in our hours of bodily pain & mental anguish, we find ourselves as naturally driven to prayer as the wreck is driven upon the shore by the waves. faith, then, we choose, rather than doubt, as the mainspring of our life." in my peril i look to the Lord my Savior and Friend Jesus Christ and trust Him wholly, knowing that there is none else i can turn to and talk to so deeply and closely. prayer is the food that is needful for me, and how much i fail to understand that. Christ has taken hold of my heart and caused me to remember that there is no reason for me to be angry or disappointed by anything that has caused me heartache. blessed should i be when i face troubles, because thine is His glory! ranier maria rilke once wrote, "she who reconciles the ill-matched threads of her life, and weaves them gratefully into a single cloth- it's she who drives the loudmouths from the hall and clears it for a different celebration where the One guest is You." from the moment my life began, the Lord was weaving my "cloth" into who I am, creating a unique masterpiece. that reminds me much of corrie ten boom's example of the tapestry. on the outside i looked like a beautiful and perfect tapestry, but underneath, deep inside, i was a complete tangled mess of threads until Christ took me and untangled the threads of my life and made me beautiful inside. He made me into His tapestry. "so i put aside the masquerade and admit that i am not okay, which may not be the thing to say, but i'm not ashamed to need You more each day." - nichole nordeman

"when anger fills your heart,when in your pain and hurt, you find the strength to stop, you bless instead of curse.when doubting floods your soul, though all things feel unjust,you open up your heart,you find a way to trust." - sara groves